Priceless

First we're told, "You can't use paper bags, you're killing all the trees." Then, we switched to plastic bags, but "You can't use plastic bags, they hurt the environment." So, now we have this new fad, reusable grocery bags. They're supposed to be good for the environment - they're GREEN. Man, I hate that word. They ruined a perfectly good color, but I digress. Anyway, now they are telling us - wait for it - that Reusable grocery bags may cause food poisoning.

If you listen to these idiots you might as well kill yourself because just living hurts the environment in some way, you wouldn't be able to do anything if they had their way. Wait, don't kill yourself, that will release carbon. Maybe just have yourself frozen, but there are too many people. I know, just tell them to SHUT UP.